


showstopper

by untakenbeepun



Category: Kaleidotrope (Podcast)
Genre: Fluff, Other, SO MUCH FLUFF, harrison is ready to throw hands with an old lady, i don't know how baking works, i'll think of a better title when i'm not asleep, it is two o'clock in the am lads
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-15
Updated: 2018-12-15
Packaged: 2019-09-18 11:56:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,483
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16994562
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/untakenbeepun/pseuds/untakenbeepun
Summary: Drew is a contestant on The Great British Bake Off.





	showstopper

**Author's Note:**

> I LIVE IN A WORLD WHERE BAKE OFF NEVER WENT TO CHANNEL FOUR AND MEL AND SUE AND MARY ARE STILL THERE

“C’mon! It’s starting!” Drew yells through the apartment, fluffing cushions on the sofa, and pulling the blanket out from where it was tucked under the coffee table.

“WAIT!”

The screech filters from the kitchen and is accompanied by a set of loud bangs and then a clatter, tell-tale signs of several things falling off the shelves. Drew does his best not to sigh.

“Thirty seconds until it starts!” Drew calls.

“Well, tell it to WAIT!”

Drew grins, flopping down onto the sofa and pulling half of the blanket over himself. Harrison would ask the world to wait for him, and the world probably would. He appears twenty seconds later, kicking the door open, arms laden full of several bags of sweets, a bowl of popcorn, and most importantly, three boxes of Samoas.

Harrison manages to waggle the Samoa boxes from the crook of his elbow. “I brought our favourite!” he says, with the same sunny smile that never fails to turn Drew’s insides to jelly.

“I can see that,” Drew says, a half-smile edging at his lips. “Need a hand?”

“I got it!”

In a feat of dexterity that only Harrison would be capable of, he drops everything he’s holding but spills nothing, and before long, the table is full of snacks, and Harrison is under the blanket with Drew, grinning up at him with twinkling eyes.

Drew leans down and kisses him because he can’t _not_ , and then the show starts.  

Mel and Sue are on the screen talking, announcing biscuit week, and then the title screen shows, a few moments pass and then:

“IT’S YOU!” Harrison shouts, drumming excitably up and down on Drew’s knee.

“This is the fifth episode,” Drew says, looking down at Harrison fondly. “Is the excitement of seeing me on TV ever going to wear off?”

“ _Never.”_

The baking begins, and Harrison squints his eyes as he watches Drew in the background of the shot.

His eyes shoot open. “Wait, are those—”

He’s interrupted by Sue’s voiceover: “ _Drew is making_ _an American Girl Scouts favourite: Samoas, a chewy and crisp cookie, coated in caramel, sprinkled with toasted coconut, and striped with a dark chocolaty coating.”_

“Drew!” Harrison says, looking up at him in wonder.

“Told you this was going to be a special episode.” 

On screen, Mel, Sue, and the judges, Mary and Paul, are standing at Drew’s table, looking down at the beginnings of Drew’s bake.

“ _Hello, Drew,_ ” Paul says, looking down at Drew with an icy stare.

Drew matches it, unflinching, looking Paul right back into the eye. “ _Paul._ ”

Harrison squeals into Drew’s arm. 

Drew pauses the TV. “What? I’ve only said one word!”

“It’s the way you looked at Paul right in the eyes,” Harrison says.

“Stop the presses,” says Drew, deadpan.

“ _No one_ looks at Paul right in the eye. He looks like he could tell you the exact moment you’re going to die just by looking at you.”

Drew snorts.

“What I’m saying is, you’re very brave,” Harrison says in a low voice, looking up at Drew with a set of dark eyes, “and it’s _very_ sexy.”

Drew clears his throat, ignoring the hot feeling on his cheeks, and unpauses the TV. “Let’s actually make it to the end of the show, shall we?”

“ _So, what have you got for us?_ ” Paul asks.

On-screen, Drew explains his bake.

“ _Why Samoas_?”  

There’s a pause and a dewy-eyed expression takes over Drew’s face along with a dopey smile. “ _My boyfriend Harrison used to bring them for me before we were dating to try and make me smile,”_ he says, “ _they’ve become very special to us.”_

Harrison squeals again, and shifts, resting his head against Drew’s chest, his ear pressed against Drew’s heartbeat. Drew slings an arm across Harrison’s shoulder, holding him tight.

“I can’t _believe_ you mentioned me,” Harrison says.

It’s hardly a surprise, Drew wants to scoff. He has trouble keeping himself from gushing about Harrison every time he opens his mouth.

“Just keep watching,” Drew says with a smile.

The episode keeps going, flashing through other contestants until the camera focuses on Drew again.

Drew starts speaking to the camera while he bakes, that moony expression taking over him again.  “ _We live in America, so I’m staying here in a hotel while we film the show_ ,” he says. “ _It’s... hard being away from him. I miss him so much_.”

“Drew,” Harrison whispers into his chest, shifting to look up at him, starry-eyed.

That famous blush of Drew’s covers his face. “Well, it’s true. It _was_ hard being away from you.”  

He leans down, Harrison leans up and they kiss, Drew’s hand cupping a cheek, thumb stroking his skin. Drew grinned, leaning in further to deepen the kiss, until Harrison pressed his hands to Drew’s chest.

“Wait,” he says, “I don’t want to miss the episode.”

“We could always record it,” Drew says huskily, forehead pressed against Harrison’s.

“But I want to see the live reactions to it,” Harrison says. “Twitter always has very interesting things to say about you.”

Drew leans back against the sofa, letting out a sigh. “Okay. But _after_.”

“After,” Harrison agrees, that irresistible grin of his on his face again.

They settle back down, Drew running his fingers through Harrison’s hair.

Onscreen, Sue is talking to Drew.

“ _Does your boyfriend do much baking?”_ she asks.

Drew lets out a loud laugh. “ _I won’t let him. I like things best when they’re not on fire.”_

“Hey!” Harrison yells indignantly, slapping Drew’s arm.

Drew shrugs. “It’s still true.”

Harrison nudges him and pouts. Drew grins.

Sometimes Harrison is too adorable for Drew to handle.

The episode draws on, the bakes take shape, and soon enough, there are five perfect round Samoas on a plate in front of Drew.

“They look amazing,” Harrison says.

He reaches for one of the boxes of Samoas and takes out two, biting into one and shoving the other into Drew’s mouth, giggling and spraying crumbs everywhere when he sees Drew’s expression. 

“For old time’s sake,” he says, by way of explanation. 

Drew doesn’t say anything, he just chews on his Samoa and tries not to smile.

On-screen, the bakes are ready to be judged, Paul and Mary standing in front of Drew’s table. Harrison tenses up.

“Whoever said this show was relaxing was a dirty liar,” he comments, “because this is _stressful_.”

Drew rolled his eyes. “You already know I make it through.”

“ _Still.”_

There’s a very long pause while Paul chews, and then a long look shared between him and Drew. Then, he reaches out his hand and offers it to Drew.

Harrison screams.

“Drew!” He bounces up and down in his seat, hitting Drew in the arm over and over again. “You got the handshake! YOU GOT THE HANDSHAKE!”

“I know, I was there.”

“Do you not understand how much of a big deal that is?” Harrison says. 

“I’ll add it to my CV,” Drew says, dryly.

“ _Excellent, really excellent_ ,” Paul says on screen. “ _Your boyfriend would be proud_.”

“Hey, look,” Harrison says, his eyes twinkling, “you can finally see that blush of yours for yourself.”

It’s true: on-screen Drew ducks his head, a small smile flickering across his face as his cheeks turn red.

“Now the whole world knows about the Drew blush,” Harrison says, gleefully.

“Great.”

“And Drew?” Harrison says, his voice taking on a much softer tone as he shifts so he can look at Drew in the eye. “I am _very_ proud of you, you know that, right?”

Drew has no response to that but to kiss him.

The episode moves onto the technical, and Drew gives a very long sigh.

“I hated these,” he says. “I don’t think I’ve ever been more stressed.”

“Aww.” Harrison ruffles Drew’s hair. “But you always do so well.”

Mel and Sue announce the challenge, a complicated bake that none of the contestants have heard of, and of course, they have to make a perfect identical dozen.

The camera cuts to several of the contestants looking down at the instructions and scratching their heads. Drew looks down at his while tying his apron strings.

Harrison hums appreciatively. “I love a man in an apron,” he says.

Drew grins. “I’ll buy one for the kitchen right away.”

“Oooh, can you get one of those ones that are just a set of naked abs on the front?”

“...what are you trying to say?”

The technical proves to be one of the most difficult, and not long into the task are most of the contestants stressing out.

“ _Drew!”_ Mel says, as she approaches Drew’s workspace. “ _Where’s that usual cool demeanour of yours gone?”_

Drew gives a nervous laugh. “ _I think this may be the one that gets me into trouble, I’m not going to lie.”_

Mel wishes him luck and moves on, but the drama of the task isn’t over yet.

About three-quarters of the way in, Drew’s bake is taking shape. It had taken him ages to get the mixture right, and now there were six perfect biscuits sitting out to cool on the side of his desk. The other six were in the oven, waiting to join their friends. Drew’s kneeling in front of the oven, a part of him aware that he looks like an idiot on television, the other part of him just worried about the bake. 

On the desk behind him, a sweet lady in her seventies, Deborah, is struggling. Her workspace is crammed full of failed attempts, no space to start over. She appears at Drew’s side, eyeing the free space on his desk.

“ _Can I...?”_ she asks, looking down at Drew, gesturing at the workspace.

“ _Of course!”_ Drew says.

It turns out to be a mistake.

Deborah, while wonderfully sweet, was a little scatter-brained, as well as messy, and while she’s wildly attempting to mix something, her elbow collides with Drew’s cooling rack.

It slips, and Drew’s carefully made biscuits go flying.

Off-screen, Harrison yells. “NO!”

On-screen, Drew pales and winces.

Deborah, bless her heart, tears up, and begins to apologise profusely. 

“ _It’s fine,”_ Drew says, “ _It’s fine, please don’t cry.”_

“It is not FINE!” Harrison snaps, slamming a palm down onto the sofa, sending his snacks flying. “She SABOTAGED you!”

“Harrison!” Drew splutters, “you’ve met Debbie, you said she was nice!”

“That was before I knew that she _sabotaged_ you.”  

“It’s not that serious!”

“EVERYTHING IN BAKE OFF IS SERIOUS.”

The challenge moves on. Drew hastily tries to make a third batch of biscuits, but there isn’t enough time. When the challenge ends, and they have to bring their creations up to the gingham covered table, all he can do is offer up six perfectly cooked biscuits, and six that are severely under baked.

Drew ends up coming last in the technical.

While the judges are sitting in the back room, discussing the bakes, Harrison is seething.

“She didn’t even admit that it was her fault!” he says.

“Harrison, come on,” Drew says, “it was a stressful environment. It wasn’t her fault.”

Harrison lets out a huff.

“ _So, Paul, Mary, who do you think needs to watch out?”_ Sue asks.

“ _Well, after an excellent signature, Drew disappointed us by coming last in the technical_ ,” Paul says. “ _He’s going to need to come up with something amazing in the showstopper if he wants to stay safe.”_

“Oh, NO!” Harrison practically growls. “They’re NOT sending you out.”

“You remember that I was in the top three, right?” Drew says. “You were there when the finale was filmed.”

Harrison claps his hand over Drew’s mouth. “Sssh. I want to experience this like an ordinary viewer would.”

Drew rolls his eyes.

And then, it’s time for the showstopper, Harrison gripping onto Drew’s hand in excitement.

Drew smiles down at him. “I think you’re really going to like this one.”  

Soon, the camera moves to Drew.

“ _Tell us about your showstopper, Drew_ ,” Mel says.

On-screen, Drew ducks his head and grins. “ _My boyfriend and I met while hosting a radio show together in university. He... he honestly drove me crazy. He challenged me on everything, we bickered like nothing else, and honestly, I was so gone for him from the moment we met,”_ he says, a moony expression on his face as he loses himself in his thoughts. Then, he seems to remember himself, and starts to speak again. “ _S-so, I’m going to construct a recording booth out of biscuits, and decorate it with chocolate microphones, and make another batch of Samoas. I don’t know how it’ll go down with Paul and Mary but... but I think Harrison would appreciate it.”_

Drew-on-TV smiles as he says Harrison’s name, blush colouring his cheeks again. 

Harrison presses his grin into Drew’s chest. “I can’t believe there was even a moment that I thought you weren’t romantic,” he says, “because you’re the most romantic person I’ve ever met.”

“Yeah, well, you bring it out in me,” Drew says.

Then, they’re kissing again. Drew slides an arm under Harrison, pulling him up onto his lap. Harrison’s fingers trace down Drew’s jaw, gliding round to cup Drew’s cheek, pressing their foreheads together.  Harrison’s legs straddle across Drew’s, and as the kiss deepens, his arms wind around Drew’s head, fingers tugging at Drew’s hair.

“So,” Drew whispers as their lips part for air, “want to take a rain check on finishing this episode?”  

Harrison sits up sharply. “I want to see how the showstopper goes!”

He hops off Drew’s lap, and turns his attention right back to the screen, flying out and grabbing his phone from the table.

Drew sighs, but he can’t help but smile. “You’re a tease, you know that?” he says, ruffling Harrison’s hair.

Harrison leans into the touch, looking down at his phone. He freezes.

“What is it?”

“Drew, we’re trending.”

“What?”

“We’re _trending_.” 

He waves his phone at Drew, and sure enough, there they are: #Harridrew, trending on Twitter.

“The episode’s not even over yet!” Harrison says.

He scrolls through some of the tweets, reading a few of them out.

_Listening to Drew talk about his boyfriend is too adorable for me to take! #Harridrew._

_Wish I had a boyfriend as adorable as Drew. #Harridrew._

_Drew to win!!! #Harridrew_

“Oh, God,” Drew says. “I can’t believe that silly nickname is back.”

“You can’t escape Harridrew,” Harrison says. The smile on his face could light up a city. “Harridrew is forever.”

“That’s cheesy as hell,” Drew says, but he’s smiling, he can’t help it, he can’t possibly stop himself, not when Harrison’s looking at him like that.

“Drew?”

“Yeah?”

“Have I told you how much I love you today?”

Drew’s lips tick upwards. “I could use some clarification.”

Harrison smiles, something twinkling in his eyes before he leaps at Drew, hands sliding through Drew’s hair as they kiss, rolling on top of him as they kiss, and kiss, and kiss, the episode finally, blissfully forgotten.


End file.
